Learning to Scream

Thanks, Poison Idea, for writing such a killer song.

Anyway, they say that patience is a virtue. That is one of those "other virtues" that Maximus can do without. I've always been the patient one, giving everyone else all the time in the world to find their comfort zone, but it's all lead me nowhere. All this patience has me living at my dad's house, single, broke, and working a shit job to validate my existence to who? My band mates? Girls? My folks? What does it say that I'm working my ass off, and squeezing in an hour or two every other day to be who I am? What does it say that when a woman is everything I ever hope to have, I'll drop everything to be with her only to have her dash into the arms of some fratboy butthole?

It kills me to be so calm and understanding, ready to stand on the sidelines while everyone else fingers their asses until they wake up and realize that they might only get one shot at life, and though there's no guarantee of success with every try, there is absolute guarantee of failure if you don't try.

I feel like I'm in many people's future, but goddammit, the future is never here, only the present, where I am miserably waiting for someone to catch up. Or at least try.